Sara Survivor
Thursday July 15th 2021
I went for my follow up mammogram 2 days ago and today went for a needle biopsy. I should have known that something was up because what was usually a long wait took no time at all. While prepping for my biopsy the radiologist said that most of the time these types of “abnormalities” of are malignant. The word hung in the air and I had my first glimpse that thing were not going to be the same again.
At first I was annoyed that I was going to have A LOT more medical appointments and then it sank in that I probably have breast cancer. I grew up at a time when breast cancer was pretty much a death sentence. I though of the Susan B Kolman 5K race that I did. I thought of my aunt and cousin who had this. My friends and coworkers who had it. Looking back now I don’t actually know anyone who has died from it. I just didn’t want this journey for myself. And I cant stop crying. I want to glorify God through this process and use this as a witness for my faith but right now I was just overwhelmed.
During the ultrasound guided biopsy, I was positioned where I could see the video screen and see the different tissue that they were concerned about. There was something that looked like a grape (Cancer) and there was another circular object that actually was my rib. I could see the needle come in and stab the grape. Then I saw the probe which looked huge in comparison come in and pierce it. Then Dr Simon put a marker in the grape to track its location. I had another mammogram to be sure that the marker was in the correct place. I think it was pretty bloody since the incision site was not yet closed. Dr Simon said this mass is likely stage 1 and was 1.4 cm in size. 99% survivability rate. At least that sounded good.
Back to the biopsy room to get cleaned up and close the incision site with “super glue” or dema-bond. The wonderful ultrasound tech named Jill bandaged me and wrapped my chest with a wide ace bandage like a soft jog bra. I was surprised at how comfortable it was.
Before I left, I met with a very nice nurse coordinator, Susann, who would help me with anything I need through this process. I cried non-stop while she told me about support groups that meet the 2nd and 4th of some day of the month that I can call her whenever I needed her. She asked if I had someone at home and I said yes because my husband works from home. I didn’t tell her that I had a full day of work before I would see him. I had 2 icepacks to take with me to tuck between the layers of the ace-wrap and I also brough a zip lock for ice I could obtain along the way. The ice pack she gave me worked well. The ice in the zip-lock leaked terribly but I didn’t care. I wore a lab jacket and pretended that everything was fine. I was surprised that the needle biopsy was a lot more involved than I ever thought. I told my husband who was super supportive. I told him that I was so grateful to have him as my constant companion. I told my boss and cried some more. She said that I can have off for any appointments that I needed.
I ended up getting the confirmation call the next day that it was low-grade cancer and slow growing. I wanted everyone to know so they could be praying for me but I was crying all the time and was not able to form the words “Breast Cancer”.
I told my sister and brother in law who is a doctor and my other doctor friend. The nurse also called and talked about Estrogen and Progesterone sensitive tumors. Something about HER2 which means that the tumor is more aggressive. They will be doing more tests to find out more about what type of tumor it is. I will need an MRI and will need to met with a breast surgeon who would coordinate my care.
I ride my bike most Saturdays with a group. One friend had told me that his wife just had breast cancer during Covid. I was lucky to find him and tell him that I had cancer. Of course I cried but he was so kind and put me in touch with his wife, triathlon and PT friend, Julia. Julia called me later and gave me the whole rundown. Breast Surgeon, Estogen, Cancer Type. She had the same type of caner as me. She had a lumpectomy and radiation during surgery. No chemo or further radiation. She also met with a plastics guy who reshaped and lifted both breasts. Silver lining. Who wouldn’t love a lift!
Still I don’t know much about the properties of the cancer I have. Still pending. My nurse coordinator sent me an email with an appointment with my breast surgeon on August (Friday) the 13. I read more about breast cancer at www.breastcancer.org. I am becoming very educated on a subject I really didn’t want to know much about.
I tell more people and get more hugs and prayers. I cry all Saturday grieving my health, my innocence and all the things I would give up to fight this cancer. Kari is getting used to be crying all the time. I learn about copays and deductibles and realize that I will be out at least $6000. I am learning to rely more on God. My friends and family share prayers and Bible verses with me that make me cry some more. People text me the most encouraging words. I think I could call on anyone of them and they would be there to help me with whatever I needed. I feel so very loved.
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